November 27, 2021
Can A Man’s Heart Love Two Women? Love

Can A Man’s Heart Love Two Women?

Can a Man’s Heart Love Two Women?

I pondered over Tijani’s words and I could remember how he emphasized on the fact that he loved both Lara and Tinuke equally. In his words, “You can’t understand Bukola, these two ladies are unique in their own ways. I really want to marry both of them, you know? It is like having pounded yam with efo riro and jollof rice with plantain. You can’t really say which one is better than the other.”

And it inevitably brought up the question, can a man love two women equally without being partial?

It really goes down to how you define love. If a man claims to love two women, then he is probably getting something he needs from each of the women. Just like Tijan’s. One meet need A; the other meets need B. He thinks he can have it all by keeping both women. He thinks he can have it all. I think this is a kind of conditional love, as he feels both women meet his needs respectively.

True love is unconditional. You accept your partner for exactly whom they are, irrespective of their flaws, learn what it means to not always get what you want, to tolerate and accept your partner just as they are.

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Also, my belief is that you can only be “in love” with one person at a time and that if then you find out you are in love with two persons equally, then you are not really “in love” with either of them. That is, one love will overshadow the other, and you will get to find out who you truly love between the two. Although it is a confusing feeling to have, a man is at a stage where he is confused and can’t determine how he feels about both women, then he doesn’t likely love either woman. If he does, then he may never know it until he either has lost that person, or until it becomes a problem where he is at the point of choosing or losing both and ending up alone in the end. You either love someone, or you don’t! When you truly love someone, there is not a decision to be made. They are all in your mind and you care about every sense of their well-being, the thought of putting them in emotional pain by loving someone else will come to your mind when you intend to take a second lover. In fact, everyone else becomes an afterthought.

In conclusion, loving someone genuinely is choosing to love the person come rain or shine, embracing all the faults and imperfection. When you know this, then you find it difficult to develop interest in someone else because you understand that even though there are some imperfections in your partner, you have chosen to love her unconditionally. It is hardly possible to love two people equally without admitting the fact there is one of them you won’t mind losing. And even if you try to love two people, the one you truly love more will get the better attention, love and care.

There is a popular quote by Mary McGregor: “Torn between two lovers feeling like a fool, loving both of you is breaking all rules. The fact remains emotions demand partiality. That is, the preference of one over another, which entails some sort of exclusivity.”

BY Opeoluwa Idowu.

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